Parenting

Make Memories with the Grands!

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In this time in history grandparents are providing more care then ever for grandchildren. Whether it is daily care or setting aside a few days in the summer for time together, we will create life long memories with our grandchildren. I have a friend who has her grandchildren over for a few days during the summer. She calls it Grammy Camp. I love the photos and stories she shares! Here are some ways that we can make the most of our time with grands:

Consider local activities and options for activities

My friend’s primary goal is for them to have time together. What is your goal? Make a list of local places to go, games, work projects or chores, arts and crafts, shopping and ask the grands what they want to do. Pre-prepped craft boxes can be bought on Amazon, the dollar store, or at Walmart. They save prep time and all supplies are provided. However, never underestimate the power of play dough, like these play dough monsters or a sensory box of rice, such as this one for your littles.

Shopping is part of the Grammy Camp tradition. She gives them money for shopping in individual decorated envelopes. She described that it is fun to see them shop, select, and pay for the items. What a wonderful time to practice these life skills!

Make a simple but flexible schedule

A daily routine helps young children as it provides stability and predictability. Whether or not children are in your home for a day or a few days, set a routine. For example: wake-up, have breakfast, get ready for the day, go to a park, have lunch, quiet time, afternoon adventure, supper, games/crafts, story time, then bed.

At my friend’s Grammy Camp she lets the teenagers have time to sleep-in, but when she has the littles, they have more structure. She has them set their own rules and says its fun to see what they say.

Food. The Menu.

Planning food ahead is so helpful. Talk to your grands and parents and see what they like and how much they are able to help in the kitchen. Just having a standard breakfast for all mornings might work better than lots of choices. At Grammy Camp the kiddos help set the menu with lots of veggies and fruit included. They also help with cooking and clean-up depending on their ages. Again, what an awesome opportunity for reinforcing important daily skills!

Take photos!

It’s easy to take photos these days. Take them of the grands and be sure that you get into the pictures too. Have them printed or put into a photo book. There are so many options for photo books: Walgreens, Chatbook, Shutterfly, and more. There are very few pictures of me and my grandparents. I wish I had photos of us. Your grandchildren will want photos of you too!

Make memories together!

The purpose of this post is to encourage you to spend time with the children in your life…grandchildren, nieces, nephews, and friends. Whether you have an afternoon or five days together, make a plan with simplicity and flexibility in mind. Spend time together and have fun as you make some awesome memories!

10 Ways to Play at Grandma’s House

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We became grandparents two years ago. Ruby is such a little joy and ray of sunshine. We love having her over and truly enjoy having play time together, but not the full responsibility of parenting. Since she lives nearby we have a created a play space for her so we are ready to go at a moments notice. Here are some of our favorites items that we have on hand for play:

1. Flashlight

Ruby loves to swirl the flashlight on the ceiling, walls, and floor. They can play hide and seek with objects such as Easter eggs, pumpkins, and pompoms are examples.

2. Tongs

The purple tongs in the photo are found at Walmart in a set of three graduated sizes. I love them because they have no re-moveable or moveable parts. Tong play supports early scissor and fine motor skills. Pick up cotton balls for transfer play. They can be used to stack blocks too. Just have them out for easy access and your child will discover his own way to play. If you need more tinkering and fine motor ideas, check out this post.

3. Containers

Plastic tubs and containers, both large and small, are great for transfer play, pouring, matching lids, and learning how to take the lid off and on. Ruby spends much time pouring rice, dirt, and water back and forth into containers.

4. The three B’s: balls, blocks, books

These traditional toys are the best! How can we play? The list is endless, but here are a few ideas to get things started:

Blocks: Build, stack, talk about the building, count the blocks, sort the blocks, play along side your child and build what they build.

Books: Read! Talk about what is happening, name the pictures, notice colors, rhyming words, letters, numbers and so much more. If you need ideas for books, start here.

Balls: Play catch, throw them into a basket, kick them…

5. Drawers ready for explorers

Have two to three drawers or cabinets safe and ready for play. If other drawers are opened redirect your kiddo back to the drawers that are ‘theirs’. Make sure safety locks are on drawers and cabinets that have unsafe products in them. We have locks on hand that we use when Ruby is here.

6. Cars, trucks, baby doll and blanket

These are must for pretend play for boys and girls!

7. Soft Pillows

While kids don’t typically stop for long, it is fun to have some super soft pillows for story time and quiet moments. When Ruby is playing on her own, I love to have a pillow on hand for me! I stretch out on the floor and just watch her discover.

8. The Three P’s: paper, paint, play dough

Have a paint shirt on hand ready for painting with water colors. The best play dough is home made. Click here for lemon-lime play dough, Christmas play dough, and play dough monsters.

9. Old keyboard

Remember the fun of typing on an old typewriter? Our new generation finds banging on an old keyboard just as fun! Check it for lose keys and parts and remove cords for safety.

10. Grandpa

Every grandpa is going to have his own style and level of comfort when interacting with the grandkids. Some prefer to observe from a distance and others like to play and be more involved. Ruby’s Papa takes a more hands on approach. He has spent hours swinging Ruby in the swing, they go for walks in the neighborhood, and he just watches her as she plays outside. He has created spaces for her to play in our yard as well. This spiral log walk is a favorite.

Extra Supplies:

Keep a basket of extra diapers, wipes, a jacket, sunscreen, a change of clothes, hat, and any other supplies that will help your grandbaby be safe and comfortable for spur of the moment visits and outings.I also have an umbrella stroller in the car ready to go.

8 Gentle Phrases to Guide Your Exploring Toddler

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Life with a busy toddler can be a challenge. Tantrums and meltdowns can be a millisecond away since they have their own opinions and ideas, minimal self-regulation. Everything in the world is new and exciting and must be explored. Their language is still limited. They struggle to put their thoughts in words and we sometime wonder if they understand us or are just being stubborn.

Here are eight gentle phrases we use at our house that work for us. I hope they will help you guide your little explorer through turbulent times into calm waters too!

1. I need to (state the need). I will be gentle.

Have you ever seen the grown-up that goes to a child without warning and furiously wipes the child’s nose or face? The child resists and flails his arms in defense and protests, then the adult chastises the child for resisting or crying. I hate that!

Before wiping a child’s face or nose, or doing anything that requires cooperation, tell them what you are going to do and that you will be gentle. For example, “I need to wipe your nose. I will be gentle.” Then be gentle. That doesn’t mean the child will like it, but when they know what to expect, and it happens gently, it builds trust and cooperation over time. This also models being gentle and ties that word to the action. It shows respect for the little person.This is not asking permission either. It is stating what is going to happen and following through.

2. Gentle hands, please

When a toddler is playing rough or when they are grabbing something too harshly, stop the behavior and say, “Use gentle hands, please”. Then show them what you want them to do.

It is difficult for a toddler to understand when they are inflicting pain upon another person. They typically do not have the cognitive ability to understand another person’s perspective. They may be playing and totally oblivious that they are hurting someone by patting them on the back or head. Saying “gentle hands, please” is a phrase that teaches the social skill and language that will introduce seeing another person’s perspective.

3. Walk away

When your child is in mischief and doing something that is off limits, the phrase “walk away” tells them exactly what to do. It helps avoid the negative “stop” or the over used “no-no”. If she still continues the inappropriate action state, “I will help you.” Then state again, “walk away” and physically and gently guide them to safety. Follow-up with positive reinforcement “Thanks for walking away” or “There you go, that’s the way we walk away!”

5. Please…sit down/put your feet on the floor/put the book on the shelf, and etc

Tell your child exactly what you want them to do. Give specific directions, if they don’t follow your directions then show them what to do. Toddlers are such busy curious little people they are able to find trouble around every corner. We want them to be little explorers! It is extremely easy to fall into the habit of focusing on the negative by saying: ‘no’, ‘stop’, ‘don’t do that’ and more. Take that split second to think about what you want them to do and tell them exactly what to do. Also, don’t ask them. For example, don’t ask, “Will you please pick that up?” Kindly tell them what to do.

If they don’t follow your directions, they may not understand. Give them the benefit of the doubt that they may not have the receptive language to understand what has been said. Take the time to show them what you want them to do.

6. That’s not a toy

If your child is handling or playing with something that is off limits state, “That’s not a toy.” The world is a new place and everything is intriguing. Show them what they can explore. Rotating toys helps the old ones become new and fresh.

7. Thank you for….listening, following directions, putting the toy on the shelf, and etc.

Just like giving specific directions, give specific praise for what they did right. It is much more genuine than saying “Good job!” or “Good boy!” Giving specific praise is an opportunity for your child to hear exactly what they did right and supports language development by connecting the words to the action.

8. I’m sorry you’re mad

So you have used one of the phrases above and a meltdown happens. You have told your child to walk away. She doesn’t walk away. She protests or has a tantrum. That’s normal. Just expect it to happen. Be calm. Acknowledge her feelings, name them, and show empathy. Research shows that empathy is the most effective way to respond to a tantrum. (Brain Rules for Babies, by Dr. John Medina) For example, “I’m sorry you’re mad.” or “It is so frustrating when things don’t go your way.” 0r “I understand it is so frustrating, but playing with the outlet is not safe.”

Calmly be present for them until the emotions pass. Once they are calm you can guide them to walk away or give them options for things that they can do. It may take some time for them to be ready for them to move on. Give them that time, but don’t give into the tantrum.

10 Tips For Leaving the Kids Home When Parents Travel

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Leaving the kids at home while you travel can be stressful but unavoidable at times. As parents we didn’t leave our kids home often but when we did, we worked hard to make it a pleasant experience for them and their grandparents who were caring for them. Taking time for some advanced planning will give you peace of mind, and help make your time away fun for them, you, and the grown-ups caring for your kids. Here are some tips and ideas to make your travels special for you and your children.

10 tips for leaving the kids home when parents travel

Creating peace of mind for you and your child when you travel:

1. For medical care leave phone numbers for your health care provider and copies of your insurance cards. Complete a medical release form for your child so that medical decisions can be made in the event of an emergency. Include in this document a list of medications, allergies, and diagnoses for each child. Check with your local authorities or personal lawyer for further details and what would be needed in the area that you live.

2. Print a calendar and note when you are leaving and returning. This will help your child visualize when you will be home. At the end of each day they can mark off the day.

3. Create a schedule so that the folks who are providing care and your child know exactly what to expect each day. Include the times of events and activities along with address of locations so they can find their way.

4. Make an outline of the daily routine with the times to get up, go to bed, when school begins and is out, and anything else that is unique for your family.

5. Provide a list of favorites: foods, toys, blankets, games, pacifiers, and any other favorites that will help your child and the care provider have a good day together.

6. Describe bedtime routines. Bedtime can be such a challenge for young children and sharing expectations and routines will make the end of the day more enjoyable.

Making Each Day Special for Your Child

We thought it was important to make each day special for our kids. Choose one or two of the following ideas to create something for your child to look forward to each day:

7. A short daily letter to describe what you are doing on that day and what they have on their schedule for the day. The letter might include one of the following:

An inexpensive gift card for a treat such as going to Sonic for ice cream or a soda
Hints to find a gift that was hidden in the house (see number 8)
Tickets to a game or movie
A coupon for an activity such as going to the pool or park
A book

8. This is a great time to crack open a new app for the iPad, x-box game, or a new movie for an evening of fun. We would often hide these in the house and leave a hint in their letter.

9. Hide post-its around the house and in their drawers with encouraging notes for them to find throughout the week

10. If possible, schedule a time to call, Facetime, or Skype with your children. Having a predictable time to chat with you and share each others adventures.

Wishing you safe travels and your children a fun time at home!

10 Tips for leaving the kids home when you are away

Tips for Photographing Your Baby

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Meaningful Mother’s Day Ideas – from a Dad

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I am pleased and proud that my husband, Doug, is guest posting and sharing meaningful Mother’s Day ideas. He has always been a thoughtful guide as he taught our girls to show honor and love to their mother. I have been blessed to be on the receiving end of the deal. They no longer need their dad’s guidance and our girls make Mother’s Day wonderful.

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Swirl Pancakes and more for International Pancake Day!

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In honor of International Pancake Day, we are making swirl pancakes. Similar to funnel cakes, these are made with less oil and make a crisp pancake. Cooking with kids and having breakfast together is a great way to connect and make a memory. Do you have a favorite pancake memory? My mother made Micky Mouse pancakes, then served them with butter and sprinkled with sugar. If you have older kids that understand safety limits around a stove or gridle they may enjoy creating the pancakes with you.

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Post-it Note Book

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A fellow parent educator gave our group these adorable little post-it note books. She simply made a cute cover for a post-it pad. I thought they would make fun books for our kids to make that would encourage them to write. However, they could also be used as a little Mother’s Day gift or a teacher’s gift too.

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Babies, Toddlers and Screen Time

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I don’t intend for this post to be overly negative, but I am concerned. I’m concerned that screens (iPads, phones, computers, and etc) are being overused by very young children at the baby and toddler age level. There are many concepts that children can learn through the use of hand held devices. But grown-ups, please be aware that there are many skills that screens cannot teach children. Screens have limitations in early learning. There is little research available, but the following are a few anecdotal observations that I have made.